I WROTE THIS A WEEK AGO AND AM CATCHING UP ON DRAFT BLOGS IN THE HOSTEL. I CAME AS CLOSE TO DEATH AS I CARE TOO, THE DOCTORS MORE WORRIED THAN I!
I start the day too birdsong as usual and the first few breaths were my prayers.
The cool midnight breeze on my face, it's so so refreshing. The doctor's here want a whole lot of reports to assist with my request for a biopsy sample that I can send to the advanced tumour pathology laboratories.
In my enjoyment of the afternoon which you hear about below. I neglected to send all these reports so I'm sending them now after midnight for the day morning review meeting. Professor V he's sending the latest MRI and Cat Scan Imaging we did on the last tace 50.1
I spent hours digging these up and sending them, they never arrived! I do my best and shit happens!
It's the smallest things in life that give me the greatest joy and kept me going like the gentle breeze tonight and the warm afternoon sun in the courtyard I got to sit in the chair next to the rose gardens. The yellow roses smelled magnificent.
It was the first time I had left the hotel I meant to say hospital room. It's strange how I can confuse the two. So I will tell them I have power, but I walk unsteady and very very slowly but deliberately to the X-ray room. After the very fast effective German XRAY service I left to enjoy the coffee shop. I sat by the water feature enjoying gelato and cream. I needed the glucose for my immune response! There are times to rest the ketogenic diet this is one
The nurses here have been absolutely fabulous by collecting blood from my feet because I no longer have any veins in my arms and my infected port is removed.
Now sometimes I don't feel any pain when they take blood from my feet there has to be some advantages to having nerve damage to feet from all the drugs. By the way my feet are almost feeling normal. Simply the best I have felt in the last month and I suspect it's the yoga and the super high temperatures from fever has contributed to the healing. They mobilise stem cells, thats my suspicion!
When I do feel pain, I thank God as only the living feel pain!
In this joyously difficult existence I treasure any small improvements in any small part of the body.
The antibiotics had no effect until the surgery and the fevers lasted 48 hours. Lots of hell of earth. yeah my temperature peaked at 41 degrees dropped to 38 degrees and was often above 39 I was so delirious. I missed the company of my precious time and mind but I still meditated. I felt like I was on the cross. As the suffering ended the deliriousness was delicious, crazily delicious in a strange blissful surreal way.
I'm wondering if this is some Guinness Book of Records for unintentional but clearly hypothermia type treatment.
I have asked for cancer markers to be done yesterday and the results will be very interesting. I'm desperately looking for a silver lining to the slightest unexpected setback on my journey to recovery. It would be so great if the seriously high temperatures for such an extended period very good immunological reasons for an enhancement of the destruction of tumours.
The fever induced tissue damage in the brain has healed I no longer have headaches or tenderness on the scalp. I have to stay in hospital three whole days to finish the course of antibiotics as I still have a lot of blood infection and at the same time the hospital here is considering the biopsy request.
I have earlier tonight just talked to my son and daughter my wife unavailable and the link below is for them. I was so pleased to be able to fix their internet problems from a hospital bed in Germany.
I dream of having my children here beside me in my last enduring battle for my life and health and recovery. I told them tonight one sentence that I can share from my daughter
that she will love me with every breath for the rest of her life
And my son was making his movies and his YouTube channel. He will have a million subscribers I am sure. He might be the one who can document my story. I would so much like to share my story to a wider audience but my resources are very limited.
These medicines here in wonderful Germany could save so many it's my constant crying. And in the many tears all the last few days I remember my friend Ren today who died from the same infected chemotherapy port and his cancer. This is my reasoning why his immunotherapies failed. A very high level of systemic inflammation. He was a friend and one of the most inspirational men I've met. He was such brave and courageous man. IS IT WRONG I IDEALISE THOSE WHO FOLLOWED ME!
It's time for more sleep, good night my friends it's been a wonderful day to be alive on the planet.