FROM A FEW DAYS AGO
The peace of ignorance. The calm before the storm .
I ask myself if that's really true. Does matter matter? Its a nice pun, i have some fun! Fun is healing is it not in this world of greed and suffering. Fun is a pleasant escape.
I'm driving to my 11th pet scan and then just after my ultrasound and my MRI .
I've just walked the dog with my daughter it was a magic sunrise possibly the best . Day after day life gets better sweeter. She woke up 5 minutes before her alarm. I said thats yoga and the power of intention. We reflect on our sick dog and that the hair cut showed us his illness likes these scans my own.
I consider and smile about all of the other sunrises I've enjoyed all over this magnificent planet and I come back to matter what matters we are matter
Gravity acts on all matter and keeps us on this planet but I wonder what effect gravity has on our energy and our souls
I ask these questions in relation to the Bible in relation to God and the answers are within each of us they are the pearls of wisdom I keep close to my heart and do not share here
I think of my body affected by gravity I think of the Apple that falls affected by gravity and the old person who Falls affected by gravity indeed I have fallen affected by gravity with my nerve damage to feet.
So I don't think gravity affects our souls and our spirits so then our spirits can soar. I feel not be limited by gravity so gravity in a way is just another limiting Force like our thoughts.
I'm grateful for God's challenges but I don't understand them but I can still admire that which I don't understand and there is no coincidence that I'm going to have 3 scans today and on Sunday I'll be a another advanced immunotherapy medical conference so I will have a current understanding of what happened and happening in my body as much as we can. I may gain insight into this biological challenge.
And I'll have some scientists and some doctors to bounce my ideas off. fellow like minded souls and like-minded Minds who are curious about life and health and alas many of them well wealth.
I've been reflecting on mainstream media and the challenges they face at educating the public and if it's Indeed media's job.
Maybe they just entertainment and our wisdom entirely private. I suspect the responsibility for education Lies with the individual that's the message I give to my children. Use your own mind, question everything, especially my wisdom that i pump into there unformed souls. Its such a privilege being a father, we have such power thats often untapped.
Yesterday I clipped my dog's shaggy matted hair as it was finally agreed to by the boss( the wife). The clipping reveals illness in one dog thats been hidden.
my daughter and son are overjoyed so are the dogs alas beneath over here we see one dog is very thin and sick.
Sometimes I feel a little bit like a surgeon where I can cut away that which is not required or that which hides the real problem.
yesterday it was dogs hair, last week it was my son's hair , a few months ago it was my own hair in Beirut for the deadly dangerous plasma transfer . in Germany for my liver surgeries and more recently here in the family. Im like to think of myself as a surgeon of the soul cutting away beliefs that nolonger serve us. But its a self inflicted operation for only we can remove the logs that obscure our vision. But with love we can say look here look there. Cut this cut that cut it out!
The 11th pet scan went intensely like ground hog day. The stunning staff nurses were so kind and competant. I got free cd, they left canular in , i got free parking and a magnificent shave . Im getting comfortable with the polished head look. I have to keep the super computer cool. My brain that is!
Ive been waiting patiently like a saint for referals at mri and ultrasound joint. They were going to charge rental for occupying the chair.
I am so tired. I sense the lack of power in me. God its my liver.
I thought hey ive got this exploding cancer come on send the fax. Im starving its 1.30pm been 90 minutes waiting. Im dieing before the full waiting rooms eyes.
BATTLE STATIONS
The pet scan results joyfully challenging. Im cancelling mri primovist.
12 new sites of disease liver.
Its time to focus irs time for more miracles.
That all my love and energy goes to the family these last weeks and despite the considerable pressures there has been much joy.
No use complaining over spilt milk but i can certainly learn from it.
Im feeling strangely exhausted.
Its easy to live as if there is no tomorrow as with me that maybe.
This day strangely now more exhilarating like someone maybe god has turned up the volume of a good song.
Ill care for my family and sick dog while i can.
Cancers aggressive side crystal clear and that last liver surgery may indeed be cavalier.
The photo. My animal friend moby. Alive and full of vigor, his brother toby alive but soon to rigour. His lungs full of fluid. His lifes energy fading. My home office where my son creates his videos and builds world's.
Yes matter matters, so does energy, so does time.
Its 6am i have to walk and catch a butterfly named melanie whose flower is a jogging youth full of love for my most precious creation.
I am an artist. My canvas the kids, this life, this blog.
Please please pray for us here on my blog, my poor sick dog and family.
Its still the best day ever and my incurable optimism the best delusion in this world of illusion.
